Your kid is nervous before a game. Here's what to say.
The morning of. Stomach in knots. Saying they don't want to go. The script that calms without dismissing.
What they're feeling
- · Pre-game stomach.
- · Imagining everything that could go wrong.
- · Wishing they could skip it.
- · Sometimes wanting you to make it go away.
What to say (pick one)
- "Nerves mean it matters. That's allowed."
- "Want to walk me through your first play?"
- "Whatever happens out there, we go get food after."
Then stop talking.
What not to say
- "You'll be fine, don't worry about it."
- "Just go out and have fun. (Kid will roll their eyes.)"
- "Other kids don't get nervous like this."
The rule
Don't promise the outcome. Promise the relationship.
If they bring it up
- · Listen to the specific worry. Don't generalize it.
- · Help them name what they can control: warm-up routine, breathing, the first play.
- · Skip the pep talk. They don't want one.
Save this
Before a game when they're nervous
- · Nerves mean it matters. Don't dismiss them.
- · One specific question they can answer: tell me your first play.
- · Promise food after, not a result.
parentcoachplaybook.com/scripts
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Your kid had a bad game. Here's what to say.
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Your kid is upset after the game. Here's what to do.
Tears in the parking lot. Slamming the car door. Shutting down. The script for the moments words don't reach yet.